The second of the songs I wrote following my Dad’s death. When he passed away in June 2016, just over a year after his wife of 55 years, the loss hit the family hard after going through a year of cancer, then a full year without our mother, Marliss. Especially as he had seemed in good health and spirits and been so full of plans for what to do with his time alone. For me, I was suddenly without parents altogether and some of the still-raw grief from her loss bubbled up and mingled with the fresh feelings of loss of my father.
So this song, while freshly processing the grief of losing my father, turned into a more general reflection on the nature of this kind of grief, enfolding the loss of both my parents. It became a song of comfort for others, charting the path I followed, but knowing that everyone finds a different way to it. One thing I know is you can’t spend all your time stewing about the grief or the pain, you do have to find a way to let it go. While it’s OK to be sad and grieve, to take as much time as you need, I wanted to say that it’s also OK to have happy moments, to move on in measured steps – I didn’t want to feel guilty every time I caught myself feeling OK. It is a slow process, and there will be backsliding times where sadness overwhelms, but in general, every day will get you a little closer to being OK.
This song was almost like a conversation with myself, I kept going back and forth – no, “I’ll never forget…” but I’ve “just got to let it all go.” Especially the last verse I wrote, as though to remind myself (and others), you can’t run away from or bury your grief, you have to face it, process it (“It can’t be avoided, it’s got to be faced”) … but then, you can let it go.
Let it Go
When all of a sudden your world falls apart
Who do you turn to, where can you even start?
You look to the homefront, follow your heart
It’s easier said than done, but you must play your part
In it all…
Then let it go… let it go
When you lose a loved one, there’s always a fear
That you’ll lose another - even while they’re still right here
(so) Live in the present; Learn from the past
Look to the future & follow through with all you have
To the last…
then
Let it go… let it go
I’ll never forget you but I’ve got to let the grief go
Find my way forward, even if it’s slow
I’ll never forget you but I’ve just got to let it all go
To say: it’s OK to be more OK
It can’t be avoided, it’s got to be faced
The sooner you do it, the sooner that you will let it go
Let it go… let it go
I’ll never forget you but I’ve got to let the grief go
Find my way forward, even if it’s slow
I’ll never forget you but I’ve just got to let it all go
Away, for it to be more OK
I’ll never forget you but I’ve just got to let it all go
To say: it’s OK to be – a little more OK
© 2022 Scott Perry (SOCAN/BMI)
Recorded by Jackson Gardner at Flash Recording
and Adrian Buckley at Chez Miaou
Mixed & Mastered by Adrian Buckley
Scott Perry: Vocals, Guitars
Eric Lefebvre: Bass
Derek Macdonald: Keyboards
Adrian Buckley: Drums